Things I Have Read This Week Which Make Me Laugh: Volume 2
by J.J. from Kansas on Jan 19, 2012 2:19 PM CST
in Opinion
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PrintOf course this would be from St. Louis Game Time. I could almost do an entire series just based on them alone. Fortunately, I don't hate myself enough to read all of their comments. This one was too good to pass up though.
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Just give them the Cup
Not sure why we’re bothering playing this season out. Let us bow to our slack-jacked masters.
JJ
You just enjoy trolling the crap out of these guys… AND THEY MAKE IT SO EASY! A lack of depth doesn’t get a team to the playoffs 20 straight years. I went over there and respectfully read and commented a bit until a few guys became such dicks, I just left. It wasn’t worth even an argument. It’s one thing to simply say, “I don’t like what you have to say about _, but I like my team so I just don’t care.” and a whole nother thing to just say “Fuck Detroit”. What a cop out! I think some fans over there have penis envy.
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I'm not trolling
I’m discussing hockey with them.
Actually, I didn’t even comment in the thread this one came from. I’ve been having fun in the Referee Conspiracy post. There’s been some good conversation over there when you can get around the “FUCK DETROIT!” kind of stuff.
by J.J. from Kansas on Jan 19, 2012 2:33 PM CST up reply actions
just kidding about the trolling
But yeah… when you get to the F-whoever part of a discussion… it’s just game over. That site seems especially terrible for some reason. I actually liked reading stuff over at Defending Big D… those guys were wayyyyy more classy overall. Didn’t make the stuff any less funny, but dang… what’s up with these Blues fans?
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You would have thought that in the 20+ straight years that St. Louis made the playoffs, somebody in that town would have learned something about the game of hockey.
Dancing Datsyuk Decidedly Dazzles Dainty Defensemen
all they do at the games
Is cheer the fights Reed Low is like a fucking hero
by Kendal on Jan 19, 2012 7:25 PM CST via mobile up reply actions
JJ you should
just change your username to “neighborhood doucher”… I believe thats what they call you?
Best home team
in the NHL?. Hell I thought it was the wings who have won 15 straight at home… that must been have been St louis, I always get these 2 franchises mixed up.
by bond021 on Jan 19, 2012 2:33 PM CST reply actions 2 recs
St. Louis Game Time
The gift that keeps on giving
You sound like a manure salesman with a mouthful of samples.
St. Louis Gift Time?
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by Josh Howard on Jan 19, 2012 3:03 PM CST up reply actions 3 recs
I like this new feature.
I would be happy if this was a regular feature.
I put this right up there with “Brian Elliot is totally an elite goalie now”.
by tehGOALIE on Jan 19, 2012 2:51 PM CST reply actions 1 recs
well duh! he's an all-star!!!!
holay crap!!!!!!!
by kylegroombridge on Jan 19, 2012 3:04 PM CST up reply actions
Ugh
Maybe I’m just too nice to other teams fans. The “best home team” comment is pretty easy for a homer to make just by sorting the nhl.com standings by home record and seeing your team at the top…ignoring things like number of games played, points lost, etc.
I got nothing on the depth comment, and the image doesn’t give any evidence. What metric would you use…+/-? We have 4 minus players on our entire roster compared to their 8. If it’s just anecdotal, then so be it…it’s not easy to pay as much attention to all the players on every other team in the league – stats only tell so much of the story.
Hell, we’re the team that’s so deep we fielded an all rookie 4th line for a few games and loved them.
The "best home team" comment is pretty easy for a homer to make just by sorting the nhl.com standings by home record and seeing your team at the top
I just sorted by wins, and we are at the top!!!! WOOOOOH the Wings are the best team! I am also refusing to sort by points, because somehow the Rangers and Chicago beat us in that…
I'm a Homer
Yes, and let's just totally ignore that current 15-game home win streak that Detroit has
Because clearly that means nothing. Only losing 3 times at home? Eh, still not the best. Because you just don’t have as many POINTS as us, man. Who cares about your Detroit-sports-franchise-record-setting-and-fourth-best-of-all-time-in-the-NHL home win streak? Oh, we played like 4 more games at home? That doesn’t matter either. SCREW YOUR FACTS AND SUCH!
</end Blues fan perspective>
My metric for depth?
The plus/minus thing actually does a good job explaining the difference.
Detroit is a better offensive team, but the Blues are better defensively. We’re deeper offensively in that we have 9 guys with 20 or more points on the roster to their 6.
I believe the plus/minus difference shows that their depth guys aren’t better defensively (or aren’t better by enough of a margin to make up for how offensively better our depth guys are). Derek Zona wrote a piece in December about the useless energy line where he looked at how teams’ fourth lines are performing this season.
The best two? Detroit & Boston
The Blues’ fourth line was in the bottom-half of the league
I think it’s absolutely laughable to say that the Blues are deeper than both of the teams that commenter mentioned.
by J.J. from Kansas on Jan 19, 2012 3:19 PM CST up reply actions
But your folly is in using actual facts instead of retard logic
Idiots like that are unfazed by facts
You sound like a manure salesman with a mouthful of samples.
The best part for me
It’s not so much that he says their depth is better than Detroit’s, which I can at least understand because he’s trying to bash a rival.
But to lump Boston in with the Wings is pretty hilarious. I’m no Bruins fan, but I’m pretty sure that they are far superior to the Blues in pretty much every single aspect of hockey, including beer vendors and those guys that sell illegal hats across the street from the arena.
i'm loving this new feature.
too many levels of entertaining. please can we keep it?
by Papusica on Jan 19, 2012 3:17 PM CST reply actions 1 recs
The "HAHAHA!!!! There it is!!!!!" makes me laugh harder than the offending statement.
Fan of the Detroit Tigers, Lions and Red Wings.
Also, these are great
I can’t wait til the other blogs find these and send their minions in full force to argue their wrong opinions.
Fan of the Detroit Tigers, Lions and Red Wings.
Just make a checklist of opposing teams fanbases we have left to troll
Dallas is done. St. Louis is ongoing. Next is?
You sound like a manure salesman with a mouthful of samples.
Phoenix
And their 6-comment game thread from later tonight.
Fan of the Detroit Tigers, Lions and Red Wings.
I've only read a handful of their game threads
but knowing there’s a game tonight has me confident there will be another of these posts tomorrow.
by J.J. from Kansas on Jan 19, 2012 3:37 PM CST up reply actions 3 recs
I'm thinking they should organize a protest to keep the team in the desert
And then, since the team only has double digit fans, they could ask those “assholes” that fill up their arena every time the Wings play for help
You sound like a manure salesman with a mouthful of samples.
Shitcago
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Tell them they won't make the playoffs this year
The Hawks can’t go a whole month missing Sharp on the powerplay and come out unscathed
You sound like a manure salesman with a mouthful of samples.
I'm glad you liked that
I got through reading the whole conversation and appreciated that it near the very end. Like you’re reading along and thinking “hell, this isn’t dumb.” and then BAM! – “The Blues are deeper than Boston and Detroit” smacks you right in the face like a palm full of baby powder.
It’s the build-up that made this one so funny for me.
by J.J. from Kansas on Jan 19, 2012 3:36 PM CST up reply actions
When people talk about teams with lots of depth it's always the Blues' name that comes up first right?
You sound like a manure salesman with a mouthful of samples.
Always
and just think all the players we wish we had from the Blues… We’d win a cup if we only had TJ Oshie! (sarcasm)
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If I'm thinking "Deep Blues"
Then the first thing I’m thinking is that Gary Kasparov had babies with his archrival… the chess-playing computer.
by J.J. from Kansas on Jan 19, 2012 3:43 PM CST up reply actions
Aha. Ahahahahaha. Ahahahahahahahahahahaaaaaaa
It means, if Elliot is like Halak and thrives on competition…
… And isn’t a one year wonder, we have a goaltending tandem that could be the Western Confrence version of Thomas and Rask. <————————-HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HOLY SHIT
Love it. No promises Elliot stays elite, but even if he stays solid, the price is right.
Is willing to go to the mattresses with the lot of yous.
by Novacain on Jan 18, 2012 6:03 PM PST via mobile reply actions 1 recs
You sound like a manure salesman with a mouthful of samples.
by greg5897 on Jan 19, 2012 3:51 PM CST reply actions 1 recs
I told you I could do a whole series on them.
by J.J. from Kansas on Jan 19, 2012 3:57 PM CST up reply actions
These need to be framed and hung up on walls for all time
This shit is golden
You sound like a manure salesman with a mouthful of samples.
This guy is my fucking hero
We already are a Stanley Cup favorite. <———————- THIS IS THE GREATEST THING EVER
Whether or not anyone in the media want to acknowledge it. (Blues fans’ opinion > Numerous experts opinions)
I have problems coming up with trade offers cause I really don’t know Bergie’s value around the league. Is he still considered a future top 6? Cause Berglund, Bishop, and Joe Blow could work there. Is he a 3rd liner? Cause Joe Blow might turn in Cola if that’s the case. Would Tampa be willing to move, say, St.Louis <—————-Hahaahahahaha without Berglund coming into play? Is D’Agostini, the next obvious trade piece, actually more valuable than Bergie? I need answers dammit!
Is willing to go to the mattresses with the lot of yous.
by Novacain on Jan 18, 2012 7:14 PM PST via mobile up reply actions
You sound like a manure salesman with a mouthful of samples.
Tampa Bay
Definitely wouldn’t trade away Martin St. Louis if Patrik Berglund weren’t on the table.
I would imagine that if Doug Armstrong called Yzerman with a trade proposal like this, Yzerman’s first words would be something like “What? Do I owe you for 1996 or something?”
by J.J. from Kansas on Jan 19, 2012 4:15 PM CST up reply actions
Haha I just changed that today
One of my all time favorite MST3K quotes
You sound like a manure salesman with a mouthful of samples.
Nice, which episode?
My favorite is Deathstalker 3 – Deathstalker and the Warriors from Hell. Everything in that movie was golden.
To be perfectly honest I can't remember
As for my favorite episodes
1. Final Sacrifice (apparently the movie was filmed with under 2000 dollars spent and none of the actors (even George Costanza’s mom!) got paid). That said. ZAP ROUSDOUR. Oh and that old guy they met late in the movie had the greatest voice ever. It was impossible to listen to him without cracking up.
2. Laserblast. The inspiration of Uwe Bolls self-insert fanfic about shooting all his critics, Rampage. A fat cop who looks like Hank Williams Jr. (which leads to plenty of “ARE YOU READY FOR SOME FOOTBALL?”) & the nerdy Bill Gates spaz character were great.
3. Final Justice. Endless Joe Don Baker fat jokes after he had threatened to “Beat up any of the MST3K guys if I meet them on the street” = Sheer bliss
You sound like a manure salesman with a mouthful of samples.
They only want him cause his name is St. Louis
But seriously, there’s no way TB trades him for anything the Blues offer. Especially not for Ben fucking Bishop. SL leaving Tampa is as likely as Alfie leaving Ottawa or Iginla leaving Calgary. Trade away SL and Stamkos’ offensive output plummets. So they’d need a goalie and offense too
You sound like a manure salesman with a mouthful of samples.
and defense
You wanna tell me that to mah face?!
YET ANOTHER Detroit Red Wings blog.
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