Do you want a sentence about how the Red Wings fared in this game? No.
Hilariously enough, all seven goals were scored at even strength as neither team scored on the power play. Detroit got an 0-for-2 thanks to being unable to score in 2:05 worth of power play time and if we're being honest, they probably didn't deserve to get two minutes' worth of that time in the first place. At least the Wings got off 18 shots. That could have been embarrassing.
Let's move on.
1st Period 03:15 - Detroit Goal: Tomas Jurco (wrist shot) from Drew Miller and Kyle Quincey
The Wings get on the board first with a breakaway from the opponent's blue line that Jurco finishes. After a strong shift by Sheahan, Smith, and Quincey, the Ducks are only able to get the puck to center so they can change. Quincey collects at his own blue line and skates back to take stock before throwing it to Miller on the left wing side at the Ducks' blue line. Lovejoy, having just come off the bench on the opposite side of the ice, skates over to Miller to pressure, but the line change behind him has the Ducks burned. Jurco comes straight from the bench to the middle of the ice where he receives an area pass from Miller and walks in between Penner and Fowler, making a forehand-backhand move before sliding it through Hiller's pads for the goal. I'm going to give Sheahan the plus he deserves on this play but lost due to the line change and take away Datsyuk's in the process. Additionally, Quincey will get a plus for two good plays in the neutral zone. Prior to the puck retrieval, he had a previous play where a guy tried to step around him and he stymied the play to regain the zone for the Wings. Smith was all over this play and will also receive a plus for good work to keep the pressure on and force possession back to the Wings.
1st Period 03:40 - Anaheim Goal: Jakob Silfverberg (wrist shot) from Francois Beauchemin and Andrew Cogliano
The Ducks pull even quickly on a net-side rebound play just 25 seconds later. The Wings get a zone clear interrupted when Beauchemin steps up on Eaves at center, moving the puck over for Koivu to grab as he circles back across the blue line to regain the zone. Koivu drops to Cogliano at the point to make a bit of space and Cogilano follows suit with a near-immediate pass to Beauchemin at the opposite point. Cleary gets over from having passed on coverage of Silfverberg to the defenseman and gets into Beauchemin's shooting lane, deflecting the shot from the point wide of the net. Unfortunately, the puck bounces off the end-boards and right back out in front of the net where Silfverberg spins off the coverage of Kronwall and jams it behind Gustavsson. Ericsson is the lone victim on this play and will be the only man cleared. The only time the puck comes near him is on the Koivu zone re-entry and he has to play back and allow the drop pass while Glendening chases. Glendening will keep his minus for losing the post-goal faceoff. Cleary and Eaves will each pick up an extra half-minus on the turnover. I felt Cleary has the middle-of-the-ice option to Ericsson, but he should be able to get away with the safe play except Eaves isn't prepared for Beauchemin to pinch. Kronwall will get an extra minus for the net-front coverage of Silversurfer. He's playing the man's stick on the initial shot trying to prevent a tip, but reacts far too slowly to the puck going wide and his need to prevent the stick from getting down to the ice.
1st Period 05:29 - Anaheim Goal: Nick Bonino (wrist shot) from Daniel Winnik and Teemu Selanne
Two minutes later the Ducks take the lead because it's legal to run over goalies on the forecheck if you're really old. The Ducks break out of their own zone as an attempted break-out pass from their own blue line misses Selanne, but doesn't turn into an icing because Selanne is there first ahead of Andersson. The puck bounces onto Gustavsson, who attempts to poke it around Selanne, but fails as Selanne slams into him. Kindl gets back and gets to the puck in the corner first, but Selanne follows up and out-battles Kindl, allowing Winnik to come in and help. Andersson pokes it away from Winnik back to Kindl, but he loses the puck again to the dogged Selanne. Winnik gets to the puck again and now has room to circle around behind the net with nobody on him. As Quincey goes to meet his man on the far post, he can't block the pass to Bonino at the hash marks, who snaps it past Gustavsson to put the Ducks ahead. There's a lot of grab-ass hockey here, but Samuelsson will be cleared. He's actually covering where he should be. Andersson will get two minuses on coverage here. The zone entry is on him, as he lets Selanne by him cleanly because he's not covering correctly for a defensive step-up to pressure in the offensive zone. He's also not in position on Bonino from the shot because of a bad angle up the boards that he shouldn't be taking. Bertuzzi keeps his minus for temporarily coming into this play and not making a difference. Kindl will get two turnover minuses for his inability to get the puck away from the forecheckers. Quincey will get an extra minus for being far too slow to react on the Winnik play that gets him in position for the assist.
1st Period 18:16 - Anaheim Goal: Corey Perry (snap shot) from Ben Lovejoy
Perry gets another on a 4-on-4 rush where he gets too much space coming into the zone. After a missed opportunity for the Wings, Perry collects the loose puck and drops it for Lovejoy while he skates forward into the Wings and Ducks both changing. Lovejoy holds and feeds it back to Perry cutting through center. Perry gains the zone with a step on Kindl and is able to walk all the way to the inside of the faceoff dot unmolested before snapping a shot past Gustavsson to end his night. Datsyuk and Kronwall will be cleared, having just stepped onto this mess. Alfredsson will keep his minus for having the Lovejoy pass go right through him. Again, this mistake is on Kindl, who gets way too far to the inside and turns slowly, leaving Perry all the room he needs. Kindl will get an extra minus.
1st Period 19:59 - Anaheim Goal: Sami Vatanen (slap shot) from Andrew Cogliano and Saku Koivu
Mrazek gives up his first just before the period ends and the rout is on. With 10 seconds left in the period, the puck is behind the Ducks' net and is almost turned over to Tatar, who can't steal it from the referee, who kicks it to Koivu moving up ice with speed. Koivu feeds it to Cogliano on the right wing moving out of the zone at full speed. Lashoff steps up and gets burned when Cogliano tips it over his stick and retrieves the puck at the half-boards in the zone. Cogliano then drops it back to Vatanen in full-stride just inside the top of the faceoff circle. Vatanen gets everything on the shot as he steps into it and blasts it past Mrazek. Tatar is going to get a minus for a turnover thanks to him being unable to steal the puck from a referee. Lashoff will get a coverage minus for playing the neutral zone wrong. Samuelsson will get a minus for getting over to Vatanen too slowly. Smith and Andersson will be cleared as the former doesn't have the play come through him and the latter's last contribution to the play was forcing a turnover that Tatar didn't capitalize on.
2nd Period 12:26 - Anaheim Goal: One of the Koivus... Saku? (backhand) from Andrew Cogliano and Sami Vatanen
Oh hey, another goal. Seven seconds after Andersson loses a scrambled faceoff, the Ducks run a little give-and-go between Cogliano and Vatanen to create a shot from Cogliano at the right side boards above the circle. The shot deflects off Lashoff going out to challenge and then hits Andersson's skate out front. Koivu gets to the loose puck as it just sits there in essentially the same spot as the Perry goal came from. As Smith races out to challenge Koivu, the Finnish Duck backhands a shot that goes through Smith's legs and beats Mrazek high to the glove side. Andersson losing the faceoff will earn him a half-minus. Glendening will get a minus on this play despite that he's not really in on the goal-scoring. This entire sequence happens after the third faceoff loss in ten seconds for the Wings. Glendening was tossed from the first (Eaves lost) and then lost the second so cleanly that the Ducks got a scoring chance. He does the previous plays differently and this doesn't happen. Cleary keeps his minus for being beaten to the scrambled faceoff by Cogliano. Smith and Lashoff also keep their minuses, although what happens to them is just kind of shitty luck on bounces. They're actually tying up/in their lanes.
3rd Period 18:02 - Detroit Goal: Danny Cleary (wrist shot) from Luke Glendening
Hahahaha whatever. The Ducks kind of lazily turn the puck over at center when Smith steps up on a guy at the Anaheim blue line and causes him to dump it off the boards out of the zone. Ericsson gathers and feeds to Eaves who dumps it in. Allen kind of lazily plays it behind his own net and pays when Glendening bursts in on him and causes him to misplay an attempted dump up the boards. Glendening gets to it in the corner and shakes Allen with a spin back behind the net. Then, Glendening outmuscles Cogliano to escape and make a backhand pass to Cleary standing alone in front. Cleary gathers and fires a low shot that sneaks through Hiller to make it 5-2. Eaves makes a cut across the net-front just as the shot comes which I think affects Hiller's play and helps it through. I'm going to give Eaves the screener's assist. Also, it's a meaningless goal, but Glendening deserves an extra plus for the work he does turning the puck over and getting it to the scoring area.
1st Period 14:20 - Kyle Quincey (boarding): Quincey gets the gate for boarding Getzlaf. Can't do this. Minus for Quincey.
1st Period 17:25 - Dustin Penner (high sticking): Ericsson bodies off Penner on the power play and gets a stick to the chops for his trouble. Good play by Ericsson on the body positioning. Half-plus for Riggy.
2nd Period 06:42 - Daniel Cleary (cross checking): Cleary hits Cogliano in the back in a manner in which his stick makes contact with the player parallel to the ice. This is a cross-check and Cleary will get a minus for doing it.
2nd Period 18:59 - Kyle Palmieri (hooking): Datsyuk breaks into the zone on the closest-looking thing to a scoring chance that the Wings have seen yet. Palmolive very slightly hooks Datsyuk, but it's 5-1 so the ref feels bad and gives the Wings a power play. Datsyuk will get a half-plus. This is a really soft call.
3rd Period 05:36 - Danny Cleary (tripping): The Wings get pinned in their own zone and Cleary gets so tired of being on the ice that he cuts Perry's skates out from under him. Cleary will get a minus.
-1 to Pavel Datsyuk: I figure he's not 100%, but he's got to do better if he's going to be playing.
-1 to Daniel Alfredsson: Not enough of a factor outside of the turnover he had which led to a breakaway chance. Has to play better.
There were a lot of little mistakes, but I think the goals and penalties captured this one pretty well. The obvious stuff was by the people who had the worst ratings for the Wings.
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Season Totals Chart
Screener's Assist Totals
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