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Things I Have Read Which Make me Laugh: Yappin' the Playoffs

He looks so sad :(
He looks so sad :(
Jonathan Daniel

You may not remember this and, judging by reading through it for a bit, not many people do, but a while back a whole new social media program jumped onto the market and it was going to be special in a way that all of your existing places to fart into the wind wasn't.

Of course, I'm talking about Sportsyapper, the Twitteresque site that was geared only towards sports and works something like a mix between a chat room and a Twitter feed.  Honestly, it's not a badly conceived place. However, a social platform is only as good as the people who fill it and... well let's just say that after looking at it for a bit, Sportsyapper is currently a milkshake made of pork rinds and raw sewage.

What you're about to see is a cross-section of that pig-rectum stew. I tried not to feature any one poster twice, meaning I had to leave out some real gems. You may not fully appreciate the scope of these because this is the kind of bottom-feeding horseshit you'll see all over the internet, but it's very nice that these are all concentrated so heavily in one place.

Let's see what we can grab out of a ten-minute perusal before I have to come up for air and take a bleach shower.

Being a Pens fan , I can feel what u are going through ! Time to start breaking up team and all of the over priced DIVAS. !!!!!!

—Jim Liptak (@jimliptak)

It's painfully obvious that what cost the Blackhawks the overtime victory in one of the best playoff series to be contested in the last several years is all the overpriced divas on their squad. Good thing this Penguins fan has the Hawks nailed.

having to fight the awful officiating. This series isn\'t even close if called fairly. Saad hooked on the breakaway tonight and no call. Disgraceful. Hawks are the defending champs and not one series called by NBC\'s number 1 hockey crew. Obvious NHL wanted LA-NY final for the media markets.

—Matthew Jacob (@matthewjacob)

Complaints about the refs in a game where the Hawks had 2.5 times as many power plays while simultaneously losing the possession battle aside (something which doesn't quite add up, but is entirely possible in a one-game sample), I'm actually quite intrigued by the complaint that NBC saddled them with Kenny Albert and Brian Engblom as some sort of disrespect. I guess somebody so used to being spoonfed Edzoist Hawk-slobbering must feel pretty put out that he's missing.

But yeah, total conspiracy theory at work here.

i blame the blackhawk trolls . they cursed your team with being trash talking poor sports

—Boston Gamester (@bostongamester)

A Boston fan wandering into a Blackhawks yap to wag his finger about how shit-talking between the two worst fanbases in hockey is the reason Chicago lost. I love this yap.

Well... That hurts! These announcers had nothing better to do then suck the kings dicks the whole series! I\'ve made a lot of friends on here I\'ll miss talking to.. Never thought I\'d say this but let\'s go rangers

—Steven (@stevenk16)

NBC hates the Blackhawks. Never forget.

At least they lost now and not in the Finals. Don\'t think they would\'ve beat NY anyway

—John Zeedyk (@bassist2112)

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

I\'m not watching the cup

—Tyler Matthew Ambrose Gillum (@tylergillum)

Sorry to hear that, T-Mag.

Thanks for an awesome yapping season. See ya when the bears staet

—Chris Antonini (@chrisantonini)

Farewell, fond friends. May you have fair winds and following seas on your journey across the sea of yaps. I'll certainly see you once more when the bears staet.