Okay.
Man, I don’t even know.
Did you ……?
I remember back, when.
But then there was the time.
And then I said to her.
Pizza pockets?
Who knows.
Okay. Let’s regroup.
Banana phone. Anna manadfdfadfasdfkaj;
I’m only going to say this one time.
Make like a tree and leaf.
Is this thing on?
Gustav Nyquist is good.
Red Wings win. Brain short circuiting.
Recap bullets:
- FSD experiencing technical difficulties meant that the beginning of the game was brought to us via the Anaheim feed. “Great, only the worst thing imaginable,” we all thought. Nope!
- Justin Abdelkader scored 48 seconds into the game. Jesus this was great at the time. A 10:00 pm start time not only means that you have to stay up late like a young crazy person, but it also means that you’re nervous as all butt hell for an extra three hours during the day. That wears on a workin’ man like you and me. By the time 10 pm strolls around with it’s loud music and adult swim, you feel like death. But by golly your team scoring less than a minute into a playoff game sure helps.
- At 1-0, Teemu Selanne went one-on-one with Kyle Quincey and nearly burned him for the tying goal. Just so you know for the future, the words “Selanne on Quincey” work the same way Ex Lax does.
- The previous joke would’ve been better had Quincey not literally seconds later tipped a Selanne turnover to Damien Brunner who scored to put the Wings ahead 2-0. I’ll bite the bullet though because unlike most bloggers I don’t have an “agenda” or play by the rules. Fuck agendas and rules.
- Scary moment in the 1st when Brendan Smith dropped to the ice after taking a high stick to the face. It appeared as though Smith was finally on the good side of a penalty call but alas he was given two minutes for head-butting the stick.
- A first for me: I’ve been watching hockey for a good long while now, but I can’t ever remember fans chanting that the refs suck right after their team just finished a 5-on-3. This happened! In an actual game! Really amazing stuff. The chant was actually going on while the Ducks were 5-on-4 and holding possession in the Wings end. I want to talk about this again sometime in the future and possibly make a documentary about it.
- How gloriously Duck was that Saku Koivu charging penalty at the end of the opening period? And how great that the Wings convert on the ensuing power play to go up 3-0? Oh man. You know that NHL commercial with all of the speechless guys who just won the Stanley Cup? That was me for like 15 minutes after Franzen’s goal. I change my mind, this is the thing I want to make the documentary about.
- “Speaking of Koivu,” said Jeff Hancock, his weird foot-to-stick goal in the 2nd period kept the game in doubt. It has been hours since this happened and you’ve had every chance to see another replay or gather better information from the Internet. Do you still think he kicked it in? If so, Yap It.
- That goal gave the Ducks some life, and their way back into the game was led by what can only be described as a 42 year old zombie. Teemu is pretty remarkable. Say what you want about the guy, but until it inevitably comes out that he’s doping or spraying the shit out of himself with some deer antler, kudos to him.
- “Speaking again of Teemu” said Jeff Hancock, he’s a feisty fella. Dan DeKeyser looked like he hit him up high with the Wings up 4-1 and Selanne reacted like a guy who also enjoys hitting people in the face. Selanne is old enough to be DeKeyser’s dead great grandfather, but it was DeKeyser who looked the wiser, calmly skating away and leaving Teemu with his penalty.
- The Ducks scored some goals and tied the game I don’t wanna talk about it. It’s 1 god damn 17 in the morning.
- NYQUIST. FILPPULA. RED WINGS. Val has taken some shit from all of us, even the Fil Fan Club, and rightly so over the last several weeks. Well, he made a killer play that helped saved us from eating our families alive and thus subsequent jail time. He’s cool at the moment.
- The Wings did not finish the 3rd period particularly well. There is much to be concerned about. I’ll worry about that later considering the Wings are a 7 seed and did what they needed to do to split the first two games on the road against a good hockey team. I’m going to bed happy as shit.
- Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
Saturday gonna be nuts at the Joseph, y’all. Go Wings.
